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-Satan is Vanquished and JESUS is KING!!-
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| (no subject) |
[May. 12th, 2008|12:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Disciple. Oh yes. | ] |
So.. I have gotten many reminders why I hate being here. Everything from an atmosphere conducive to being extremely angry and depressed. To a spiritually poor atmmosphere. I should have stayed in Cedarville. I need to get back there, and soon.. And my mom hasn't gotten it through her head yet that I am not staying here the entire summer.. it won't happen! |
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| Lately.. |
[Jan. 15th, 2008|12:40 pm] |
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I'm learning more about Jesus. He is growing me in some pretty awesome ways. It's so funny, the farther we push away, sometimes, the more we see Him there saying, in almost a faint whisper "I love you. I chose you. I want to comfort you. Come back to me, My child. I will shelter you and love on you. Trust Me". |
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| this time.. |
[May. 27th, 2007|11:18 pm] |
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so.. im trying to be patient.. and trust you.. I'm not doing so well tonight.. because I'm just thinking periodically "one sunday, I will call.. and you won't call back".. please don't make that one tonight.. |
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| Yeah.. right.. |
[May. 13th, 2007|10:46 pm] |
So.. yeah.. it's been 4 hours almost 5 since ive called.. maybe we ought to set a time so i can feel better..
Because right now.. I'm highly doubting you.
I'm giving you a few hours still.. I'm just not sure it'll happen.. as a matter of fact, I'm fairly unsure it will happen. |
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| Still.. |
[May. 11th, 2007|03:48 pm] |
Still trying to trust.. it's up to 5 people now..
It's difficult..
Sometimes I'm not sure of it..
But I still am trying. |
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| Again. |
[Dec. 19th, 2006|09:43 pm] |
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So... I trusted people again. Yay for me. Only the 50 millionth time in my life. And again, guess what else happened? Yup, I'm being made to be a loser. Yeah, like either of you would call back.. i should have known better.. oh well.. maybe next week ill have more luck.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 13th, 2006|09:21 pm] |
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I'm happy. I leave in a week. This is a bad thing, yet a very good thing. It'll make certain people happy. Maybe it is possible (in reference to my last entry) |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 16th, 2006|02:34 pm] |
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ok... so amanda, isn't a very huggy, or affectionate person. and this past week, after i had my little oops with the excedrine, it seemed to change a bit. like once, we were waiting for the bus to go bowling, and she let me lay on her at first, and she had her hand on my arm, then she turned sideways and let me lay my head on her lap, which was odd, but it wasnt because she's a lot more like a sister than a regular friend. Then, friday morning, she laid her head on my shoulder, and at times i guess she was more comfortable sitting with her arm around me. then on the way home, she let me give her a hug. either i scared her just that bad, or she was in an odd mood. or just being extremely nice.. either way, it was good. it let me know a lot she cares. I love having her for a best friend. she's so spiritually good to have around, and is just an amazing person. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2006|06:26 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Only Grace by Matthew West | ] |
Well.. so I'm stupid.. well, not really. see, i was holding back feelings from people, and i talked to amanda about it today. She's good to talk to.. She knows when to talk and when to just listen. And she again reiterated how it's so unhealthy to hold things in. God has truely blessed me with her. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 10th, 2006|06:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crushed | ] |
Ok, so almost my whole group of friends are hanging out.. and i was completely excluded. It's no one's fault.. well, you could blame it on one.. but really, it's my fault.. because i care about my friends. Why that's such a crime, i do not know, but, it is. So, i really dont know what to do. im sick of being upset and wanting to cry.. i need to learn not to care.
I dont think they know how much this is hurting me.. and most are playing a completely innocent role in it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 30th, 2005|12:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  grateful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Strong Tower by Kutless | ] |
I am on such a spiritual high. Or maybe it's just be growing in God.. whatever it is, it's amazing! I think Amanda may be right.. about camp, and all. I went through my old diary, and it made me realize, camp holds the potential for spiritual strengthening. And, because of my past, I need any amount of that as i can get. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 19th, 2005|05:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | "I believe in you | ] |
So.. the other day i was thinking.. and it hit me.
I spend so much time looking up scientific proof to Christianity.. and i began to ask myself "Why do i do that?, is it a lack of faith, or what?" and then i got an answer.. it's not due to a lack of faith, because really, I could care less what scientists believe.. they weren't here when my God created the earth. I'm interested in the scientific proof because of two reasons:
1. It helps me defend my Lord in debates. and..
2. It just amazes me how awesome my Lord is, and science is really His creation.. so I should like science. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2005|05:10 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | complacent | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Father, Spirit, Jesus by Casting Crowns | ] |
Hey.. i havent updated in a while.. Battlezone was great.. it's really sad that this is my last year for a lot of events with youth group :( feel like ive missed out on a lot.. but ya know what.. all i can do is make the best of it, which i intend to do :) |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 26th, 2005|12:19 pm] |
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Why is it that when the Godly person you know you can talk to leaves for 3 weeks, everything seems to go haywire? I know I'll be ok, I have Jesus, but I don't know.. I don't like feeling like everything is going haywire. lol. Ok, well, I guess I'll try to call Melissa. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 22nd, 2005|08:13 am] |
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well.. today are my senior pictures.. it's exciting, one with each dog, and then one with my two best friends. Only thing is, im really nervous for some reason.. i hope and pray that it all goes extremely well. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 4th, 2005|06:49 am] |
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I'm hungry.. therefore, i shall eat.. if everything hasnt been given to Storm already.. grr. I can't wait til i talk to amanda today.. but ya know, i guess that happens when you feel unloved by someone, you get anxious to talk to someone who actually does love you. (hint, one who doesnt is my mom's mom) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 30th, 2005|06:37 pm] |
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I liked camp for the most part, it had it's negatives, but hey, nothing is perfect.. and dr. Tom Farrell is a really good speaker, he made perfect sense in most areas. except he made it sound Christians shouldnt have non-Christian friends.. how else are we supposed to get the Word out. I officially made it clear to God that if He wants me in full time Christian Service, I'm willing to. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2005|03:57 am] |
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haha.. army team won!! cuz we're awesome. now im still really unsure about camp. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 14th, 2005|08:31 pm] |
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so. i have to meet at the Church in 2 hours for New York, I'm so excited. I have such a peace about it all. And ever since God really confirmed He wants me to go, I'm so anxious to see how He uses me there, because it's going to be wonderful. And, I'm so anxious for the spiritual growth that will also take place.. SOOOO EXCITED. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 14th, 2005|10:25 am] |
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So.. it wasnt amanda, because i trust her, and she told me it wasnt, and she doesnt know who would have said it. Whoever said it, really really hurt me though. And it's honestly not so much what they said, but that it was said behind my back. Unless Jessica said it herself, in which case.. GRRR. |
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